The Five Keys to Having a Nice Conflict

The Five Keys to Having a Nice Conflict by guest blogger Kent Mitchell, Personal Strengths Publishing

Poorly managed conflict takes a toll on our time, money, health, and happiness. However, we can learn to have a nice conflict-the type of conflict that consistently leads to greater productivity, stronger relationships, and leaves everyone involved feeling good about themselves.

1. Anticipate
Anticipating conflict starts with having a better understanding of the people you’re dealing with and how their view of a situation might differ from your own. When you respect a person’s unique vantage point, you’re better equipped to steer clear of their conflict triggers.

2. Prevent
Preventing conflict is about the deliberate, appropriate use of behaviors in your relationships. If you know a person who highly values trust and fairness, you can prevent conflict with him/her by not using words or actions that threaten those values.

3. Identify
There are three basic approaches in conflict: rising to the challenge (assert), cautiously withdrawing
(analyze), or wanting to keep the peace (accommodate). When you are able to spot these approaches in yourself and others, you are empowered to handle conflict situations more productively.

4. Manage
Managing conflict involves creating conditions that enable others to manage themselves out of the
emotional state of conflict. But it’s also important to manage yourself out. Managing yourself in conflict
can be as easy as taking some time to see things differently.

5. Resolve
To create movement toward resolution, we need to show the other person a path back to feeling good and valued. When people feel good about themselves, they are less likely to feel threatened and are free to move toward resolution.

If you’d like to find out more, contact Kent Mitchell at 562-889-8286 or

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